TD Jakes: Patience & Time: -The Family Building Blocks

what I love about the word of God it


0:03not show us just the grandiose

0:07ideologies of successful families that

0:10have no turbulence but from the very


0:14family he warns us that families will be



0:25disfunctional if the first

0:28family was dysfunctional

0:33the Apple couldn’t fall too far from the


0:37all as soon as God put the man in the

0:42garden and pulled out of him the woman

0:45and they started the first family murder

0:50hit the first

0:53family is a clue that there is going to

0:57be turbulence the rest of of the book


1:01families the law of first mention the

1:04first family that’s mentioned is

1:06dysfunctional and all the way throughout

1:08the rest of the book we see turbulence

1:10we see rape we see molestation we see

1:14drunken fathers we see ungrateful Sons

1:17we see the impediments of people who

1:21dress themselves up like prostitutes and

1:24slept with their father-in-law to get

1:26pregnant to produce children this if if

1:29the the Bible were to be cinematic it

1:32would at least be rated


1:38R at least rated R because God is honest

1:44and Vivid about the fact that life is

1:49messy it’s

1:51complicated that’s why you ought not to

1:54covet your

1:56neighbor because you’re standing on the

1:58outside and on the outside every family

2:01looks good and stable and solid and sane

2:06and part of your pain comes from your

2:10comparison because you wish that your

2:13family were more like them but if you

2:15went inside the house you would find out

2:18that they are not everything that you

2:21thought that they

2:25were and maybe you better deal with the

2:27devil you know

2:34then the devil you

2:38don’t family is

2:42tough I would rather build a church any

2:45day than build a

2:47family I would rather build a business

2:50any day than build a family I would

2:52rather lay

2:55block then build a family cuz block

2:58don’t have an opinion okay

3:01block don’t talk back it stays where you

3:03put it come on somebody but raising a

3:07family see every block got a mouth and

3:11every mouth has an opinion and every

3:14opinion has to be Express and it is your

3:17job to hold together all of these

3:20different opinions and personalities and

3:22attitudes and

3:25dispositions and mood

3:28swings and mid life crisis and

3:32menopause and Adolescence you got to

3:35hold it together for a


3:41time there is no retiring from your

3:45family there is no resigning from your

3:49family you will always be attached to

3:52them don’t believe your divorce


4:00just cuz you signed the release doesn’t

4:02mean you’re out of

4:04jail cuz the first time trouble Rises

4:07the first time they have a car wre the

4:10first time they get sick the first time

4:11they get in trouble they’re going to

4:13call you and it’s going to affect you I

4:15know you said you don’t care and it

4:16don’t bother you but you going to have

4:18flashbacks cuz you got a brain and you

4:21going to have how the where are the real

4:22people at are y’all sitting in the

4:24section over here flashback have you

4:26ever had a flashback you broke up but

4:29you still got a flashback and you’re

4:32little worried but you can’t call and

4:34you tell yourself you don’t care but you

4:36do and you’re walking around in the

4:38middle of the night with that little

4:39sick feeling in the bottom of your

4:41stomach because your stomach won’t

4:43listen at your head and disconnect from

4:46the fact that you are still connected

4:48though you are free on paper you are

4:50still Bound by experience and families

4:54are messy


5:04we live in a time now

5:06that everybody wants everything

5:11quick quick

5:20love immediate

5:24gratification I’m going to talk about

5:25some stuff you don’t know about cuz you

5:27grew up on instant grits

5:33but I remember when grits were an

5:36instant so what you call good grits I

5:39just call

5:41gritty cuz real grits are slow

5:45cooked Come on talk to me

5:48somebody real grits are slow cooked take

5:51a long time to get the Grits right but

5:55that stuff y’all throwing in the

5:56microwave that you call grits is not

5:59real really grits because if you want

6:02something to have real flavor you got to

6:05slow cook it you got to put it on a

6:07smoker you got to give it some time you

6:11can’t cook CID Greens in 15 minutes it

6:14takes time to cook green you you you got

6:17to put the meat in and let it boil down

6:21and let it thicken up and let it get a

6:23little flavor in it come on somebody you

6:25got to cut your greens and wash your

6:28greens and have them in at the right

6:30time and then cover them up and let it

6:33cook down let all the juices cook down

6:37to you can’t tell the greens from the

6:39broth and see we don’t have time for

6:45that we want instant sons and instant

6:49fathers and instant marriages listen it

6:52takes 30 minutes to have a

6:58wedding but it may take 30 years to have


7:08marriage and most of us if we don’t get

7:12what we need when we need it like we

7:14need it in the style that we needed in

7:16our love


7:25language we’re out of

7:27there and all of these Love Languages

7:30sound like the United Nations to

7:34me how am I supposed to know what your

7:37love language is I’m still trying to

7:39figure out what my love language is and

7:42when your love language and my love

7:43language and then the kids love language

7:45gets in there it sounds like the day of

7:52Pentecost touch me no give me space

7:55acknowledge me no don’t make me stand up

7:58in front of people shut


8:16up the family started before the

8:22church God knew he had to slow cook it

8:25cuz it was going to take a long time to

8:28get that right

8:30he did he didn’t even bring up the

8:32church to the New Testament but he

8:34started the family way back in the Book

8:36of Genesis cuz he said this is slow

8:40grits we got to cook it real slow real

8:45slow cuz the brothers are going to get

8:48jealous what and brothers

8:53do get

8:56jealous Bishop already they’re going to


9:00and they’re going to

9:02kill and they’re going to be envious

9:04some vocally some

9:08silently but it takes a long time to

9:10have a


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